Category Archives: Steps Along This Journey

Posted on

I Want To Fly,…… But I’m Afraid of Heights

How to Live a True Spiritual Journey by Letting Go

Well, I did it!  Scared of heights,but I did it!

Staci, Jamie, Jordan, and I took on an adventure of a ropes course. (thanks to my close friend June, for gift card…shout out to Elevate Red Creek in Perkinston, Ms).  The course consists of following a “path” 15 to 40 feet above the ground.  Various obstacles must be crossed.  Climb over a wooden bridge dangling by only ropes.  Strap in to a zip line that carries you across a  river.  Climb, pull, twist, grab, jump,….. whatever it takes to get across.  You are safely harnessed, YOU WILL NOT FALL.  Right……………………

We had to go through a ground school to be able to “play”.  We had to sign “the form” so all lawyers would be happy.  This form basically says, “You are taking your life into your own hands.  Don’t do anything stupid.  There are consequences.”  We had to listen to Donna explain the “rules”.   She told each of us how to buckle, how to clip in, how to do what it takes to have fun, (and stay alive!).  I loved how she casually mentioned that if I didn’t do one particular thing, I could die.  Well, that’s just great!!!!!!!

I am deathly afraid of heights.  Get me 4 feet off of the ground and I freeze up.  No, it’s not something I can control.  I know in my head that all is “OK”, but somewhere between the brain waves of my head to the nerve endings in my legs there is a HUGE disconnect.  My legs will not work.  But most crazy of all,…………. my hand will not let go.  I can be on a 6 foot ladder, or an outside elevator, a balcony at the hotel, or the edge of a cliff, or ON A ROPES COURSE!!  Wherever I sense that I’m above the ground,  I freeze.  I can’t move.  I can’t let go.  I’m stuck.  Laugh all you want.  Call me a chicken or scaredy cat.  Don’t matter to me.  At the time, I don’t care.  Cause there is a problem,….. I want to fly, but I’m afraid of heights.

Knowing my self and my “fear” situation, I choose to boldly go where I never choose to go on purpose.  That’s right, I’m on purpose choosing to be four feet above the ground.  (Actually, I’ll be 30 feet and higher on part of this course)  My right hand is “freezing up” as I type this.  All is well, I’m actually having fun with my family on this outing.  Then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I’m overwhelmed with fear.  Yep, the hand won’t let go, the legs won’t move.  I’m stuck.  Part of me knows that I will not fall.  But a part of me (that controls my hand and legs) has shut down.  Now a part of me is embarassed.  I knew it would happen.  Everybody, and I mean everybody at the ropes course now is watching and taking interest in me.  I’m the perfect example of one of “those people”.  One of those people who are afraid.  Me afraid?  I’m down right petrified, embarrassed, unable to move, and well, mad at myself.

While I’m stuck on the rope ladder like a fly in a spider’s web, a crowd of people have somehow from somewhere gathered.  My family, other families, workers and crew, and the owner/director of the place himself……… Mr. T J.

To be honest, I was expecting to get laughed at, picked on, and in a friendly way, made fun of.  But I was hearing lots of voices.  Voices of encouragement saying “C’mon Dan da Man, You can do it!”  Voices of motivation, voices of support, voices of inspiration all were being heard by me from my loved ones.  I was hearing from complete strangers.  We were in this together,………… and yet, I couldn’t move.

Then I heard God’s voice.

OK, actually, it was T J’s voice.  He’s the leader of Elevate Red Creek.  With a calm reassuring voice, (as if he had known me for years), he said this.  “Dan, you’ve got this.  Take your left hand and move it eight inches to the left.”

When you are scared of heights, to move eight inches you might as well be moving eighteen feet.  For me to move just this small amount, not even noticeable to others, I must do something TOTALLY against my own way of thinking.  I MUST LET GO.

That’s why us “scared of heights” people are like that.  We can’t let go. Fears take control.  I KNOW that I won’t fall, but still there is the fear.

The big step here is not moving my hand eight inches to the left.  The big step is in letting go.

Colossians 3:2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

The biggest step in becoming a Christian is a step so small that it may not be noticeable to others.  You and you alone must hear God’s voice above all the other “voices” of this world.  You and you alone must realize that God can direct and control your life even better than what you might have planned for yourself.  Fears may still be there.  It sometimes may seem totally against your own way of thinking.  But to follow Christ on this Christian journey you’ve chosen, you must take small steps.  Before God Himself can get you to “move your right hand eight inches”, you yourself must do something so small, but at the same time so HUGE that it changes your path forever.  You must let go.

Easier said than done, I know.  It involves trust, faith, letting go and taking each day one step at a time. (even eight inch steps one at a time!)

I enjoyed my time at Elevate Red Creek.  I faced my fears, I made small steps into an adventure filled with more small steps.

I’m enjoying this Christian Journey I call living my life as well.  I face my fears, I make small steps everyday following God’s will and direction.  It’s an adventure.  A Holy Spirit filled adventure.  Not because of who I am, but because of who God is!!  Care to join with me in this Christian way of life?  It’s easy!  Well, ………… first you have to let go.

See Ya!  Dan Ainsworth wilderness preacher

Posted on

I’m In Over My Head

......and Why You should Join Me.

And it begins…….Time to take my log house apart, log by log, load this house on two flatbed trucks and haul them 1140 miles to our property in Westcliffe, Colorado.  Woohoo!!

I’ll admit it, I’m “in over my head”.  It’s too much.  It’s too hard.  I don’t have control over anything!   You’ve had that same “in over your head” feeling, right?  Something very important to you has become too much to handle, too expensive, or maybe just too difficult because you have lost control!  What ya gonna do now?

This blog writes about everyday things, and shares a scripture.  My prayer and goal is that God somehow then uses it to help you on your very own spiritual journey. I firmly believe that He uses me to reach out to others.  My writings have been described as simple, nothing elaborate to me or my writings.  I’ll take that as a compliment! (I plant the seeds, God takes it from there). Here is the mystery and complicated vision to my simple way of writing.  When I’m writing a story about an everyday ordinary event, what I’m really writing about is how this applies to my spiritual journey.  What’s even more puzzling is how this writing is actually describing what is going on in YOUR life and YOUR VERY OWN spiritual journey.  So, am I writing about a physical activity concerning the building of the log home, or writing about what is being seen and shown spiritually in this same exact activity, or really and truly writing something about you, but just using a physical example to help you better understand yourself?  Well, yes to all three.  Whew!!!    Let me try explaining this again.

I write a story about a physical activity that is showing a spiritual truth.  You read this story, but somehow, someway you realize that this story really is to be used by you, for you to become one step closer to God on your spiritual journey. See, there is no way that this country boy with no formal theological training from some great big prestigious school or seminary should be doing this right?  Right, cause it’s obvious that I’m “in over my head”.  The wilderness preacher tries to write a story and reveal the spiritual meaning so that it applies to you?  Really?  That requires knowledge, communication skills, and the ability to reach you in your busy everyday life.  I’ll admit it, I’m “in over my head”.  I don’t stand a chance.  I don’t have a prayer.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait……….. I do have a prayer!    “Lord, could you help me?”

For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. Isaiah 41:13

Being in over your head causes me (and I bet you) to rely on God’s Will.  Asking God for help means you are willing to give up controlling your life yourself.  That’s a big step.  We normally want to do things our way.  Getting in over your head focuses you on God’s Will, His timing, His desires for you.  Looka there,……. you are being what God created you to be!!!!!

 

My friends, over the next several months I’ll be sharing all about the activities concerning the building of the log home.   But wait, what I’ll really be writing about is the inexhaustible riches and love of Christ.   But wait, what you’ll really be reading is something that is drawing you one step closer to God.  Go figure!!

Ephesians 3:7-10The Message (MSG)  8-10 And so here I am, preaching and writing about things that are way over my head, the inexhaustible riches and generosity of Christ.

Are you “in over your head” spiritually?  Maybe you are just standing in ankle deep water afraid to go deeper?  Are you saying “little prayers” because of the fear and lack of faith in the “Big Prayers”.  Do you still keep God inside of this tiny little box that you want to control, or have you realized that this Awesome, All Mighty, All Powerful Holy Being, wants to have a living loving relationship with you?

When someone says that they are “in over their head”, they usually mean that they no longer have control.  That’s why I’m admitting that I am “in over my head”.  But it’s a good thing in my spiritual life.  I no longer have control of my life.  I gave it all to God.  He is in control.  A song I’ve been hearing a lot lately says this in one of the verses.  My faith has become my eyes.

My challenge to you is to live so that you are “in over your head”.  God can take care of those problems too big for you to control.  God will also provide opportunities to grow with Him that only He can provide.  When you spiritually live life “in over your head” you break out of that little box you hide in, you step out of that comfort zone that has made life a rut.  Most important of all, you have let your faith become your eyes.  Was blind, but now you see (with faith).

Join with me over these next few months. I’ll be sharing what’s going on with the construction of the log home.  Tell others to join as well.  This log cabin adventure has taken a life of its own.  I’m wanting to share with you through the building of my log home how God is working (and loving) each of us each and every day.

[prayer]  Lord could you be with my friends and me this week. Be with us in a way that we feel your presence.  Be with all of us as we live life “in over our heads”.  Be with us as we look to you for direction and guidance.  Lord help me and my friends.  Help me to BE what you’ve created me to be.

I’m in over my head……… and it’s right where I need to BE!!!

 

See Ya!   Dan Ainsworth wilderness preacher

 

 

Posted on

What’s Holding You Back?

The poor tree.  It’s spent a lot of years with this tire wrapped around its trunk.  You know that’s bound to have been a problem.  Yet, even with this tire in a position to restrain the tree, the tree has continued to grow.

I’m betting that years ago the tire didn’t even bother the tree.  As the tree grew thicker in circumference the tire started making its presence known.  If I were that tree, I’d be complaining……….. and so would you.   “How come I’m the only one with a tire wrapped around me. Lord, it’s not fair!”  Or the classic, “Well, if things weren’t like they are, I could be doing so much more.” Or how about this one. “Hey, have you noticed I have a tire wrapped around me?  Let me tell you about it.”(Or let me tell you about any and every problem that is in my life.  How much time have ya got?)

Poor, poor, pitiful me. I guess that’s just part of being human on this spiritual journey.  We focus on the bad, the problems, the headaches, the uncontrollable events in our lives.  We focus on the “tires” that surround us.  NOT THIS TREE!!!

This tree has taught me (and now you), a lesson.  A lesson in life.  A lesson in endurance and perseverance.  The lesson?  Keep on keeping on.

Instead of focusing on the tire, the tree focused on growing.  And grow it HAS!!  Down here in the South we would say that this is a “big ole” tree. It slowly but surely………….. (maybe I should say it patiently and steadily) grew.  The tire actually has not stopped the tree from growing. I’ve seen barbed wire wrapped around a tree that would eventually kill it.  Why?  Because the wire grew INTO the tree.  But this tree continued to patiently grow.  As it has grown, it has continued to swell inside of the tire.  The tree is in the tire, but not of the tire.

The tree is not so “poor” after all.  It has grown over time, in such a way that it is having an affect on its surroundings………… not letting the surroundings and situations affect it.  This is a strong and powerful tree.  I want to be like that!!

The lessons I’ve learned from this tree.  Have patience.  Keep going by growing.  Don’t focus and worry about what’s surrounding you.  Spend time and energy on what you let grow inside of you.  It’s more about your attitude than the “tire”.

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had. Romans 15:5

See Ya!  Dan Ainsworth wilderness preacher